Entry: When Strippers Had An Act! Sunday, October 28, 2007



THE RETURN OF PATTI'S MOM
 
I waited for Patti to come back. If a car stopped outside I ran to the window to see if she was there. I had a balcony at 1939 N. Lincoln- a "Juliet" balcony, the kind you can't actually stand in. http://subgeniusslack.blogdrive.com/archive/38.html She had left with her mom, who had re-appeared when learning from the agency that pimped her ( a fake theatrical agency) that she had given up hooking and coke for a really bad guy. Me.
 
She returned with her mom after several days and what looked like no sleep. Seems her mom had several ounces of coke when she called Patti for a meeting and that was how I ended up with a bag full along with her note.
 
I knew I would have to get out of my parents place when my mom freaked out that at 12 I was dating girls 6 or 7 years older than me. The clincher came when my dad and I got in a fight over the war. I called LBJ a liar and he socked me on the jaw. I flew over the table, the couch and right into the wall. That was enough. Meeting her mom who laid out the rules for me ( Patti was to return to prostitution because "she wanted to". I searched Patti's face for a response, there was nothing there), only reminded me of my horrible luck with parents.
 
I had met many evil people in my life, but this woman took the cake.
 
I knew it was over with Patti and I, I had actually done something decent in my life and now this woman was giving me my marching papers.
 
I hung in, but was crushed. When her mom left she told me that she was her mom and she had to listen to her. I explained I didn't listen to mine, but it was far too many years late to tell Patti that.
 
Patti responded the only way she really knew how. We had sex. Patti was beautiful, and she really did love sex.
 
Afterwards she told me she would be going to a strip club/ hotel called Swingers in Ohio for a couple of weeks. She invited me to see her perform in Chicago at a porno theater. Before the age of video and DVD's, porn theaters were the place to see adult movies.
 
Elizabeth Taylor had given the city of Chicago the Michael Todd theater for the arts. Mayor Daley, the real Mayor Daley gladly accepted the gift. Then promptly gave it to the mob for $1 a year to show porn. Taylor sued and years later got the city to stop showing porn there. Today it is the Goodman theatre, and shows plays. I like to joke the building is haunted by thousands of sperm that went on the floor!
 
Patti was a second rung stripper. Her name got on the bill, she had a following and theatres paid her huge money to travel to a city and strip. She had great outfits and was a really great dancer.
 
I sat in the projection booth with a friend of hers who was completely naked and as Patti got on stage her friend gave me a blowjob, one of the only jobs I had any interest in.
 
The Heart song Barracuda came on  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpkitLUbeEg I had a girl flicking up and down my cock with her tongue and a packed house sat in reverent silence as Patti did her dance.
 

"Barracuda" - Heart

So this ain't the end
I saw you again
Today
I had to turn my heart away

Smile like the sun
Kisses for everyone
And tales
It never fails

You lying so low in the weeds
I bet you gonna ambush me
You'd have me down, down, down, down on my knees
Now wouldn't you?
Barracuda

Back over time
We were all trying
For free
You met the porpoise with me

Uh huh

No right, no wrong
Selling a song
A name
Whisper game

And if the real thing don't do the trick
You better make up something quick
You gonna burn, burn, burn, burn, burn it out to the wick
Ooh, Barracuda

'Sell me, sell you' the porpoise said
Dive down deep now save my head
You
I think you got the blues too

All that night and all the next
Swam without looking back
Made for the western pools
Silly, silly fools

The real thing don't do the trick
You better make up something quick
You gonna burn, burn, burn, burn, burn it out to the wick
Ohh, Barracuda

Ooh, hey

 
When the song finished the crowd went nuts- and Patti still had most of her clothes on!
 
Patti was excited to be heading out to Ohio- she was sharing the bill with Marilyn Chambers whose porn film BEHIND THE GREEN DOOR was a huge mainstream hit.
 
I partied with Patti whenever I could see her, but there was no more talk of PLAYBOY, which before her mom had shown up had already had her in the mag 3 times and were getting ready to do a centerfold with her.
 
I went out with Skip Williamson the day she left and got blind drunk. I woke up on my couch in pain with no idea how I got home. Gin was my sin then.
 
A couple of days passed and I came home from the Blues Brothers bar at 5am to find a message on my answering machine. It was Patti. And Marilyn.
 
Marilyn told me she heard from Patti that I could handle two beautiful women at once.
 
She wanted me to prove it. Both girls started laughing...
 
Patti got on the phone and told me that they had bought me a plane ticket and I was to fly out that afternoon for the weekend.
 
That gave me about 5 or 6 hours to sleep. No jacking off tonight. I was going to be ready!
 

   8 comments

Heather
October 28, 2007   03:11 PM PDT
 

That is very sad about Patti- she never even had a chance. That mom should have been jailed.

Funny that I've heard the song BARRACUDA a million times- yet this is the first time I read the lyrics.

I think the porpoise was her mom!
Ryan
October 28, 2007   04:14 PM PDT
 

You got to do a three way with Marilyn Chambers?????

DAMN!
Goeff Browne
October 29, 2007   12:24 PM PDT
 

I didn't know Mike in the 60's and 70's. I met him in the 80's.

He never really talked about the past, but I can assure you the stories and adventures have gone on. He had Teller in his Warhol play, John Cleese at a Psychotronix party, a luncheon for Clive Barker, birthday party for Russ Meyer hosted by Roger Ebert- the stories go on and on. Dating Kim Catrell and Jenny McCarthy.....

His life should be about ten movies- but who'd believe it?
Jeremiadist
October 30, 2007   02:33 AM PDT
 
It shows my utter dorkiness, I suppose, that I am more impressed by the fact that Pope Flores got drunk with Skip Williamson. What can I say? I'm satisfied with my sex life, but clearly need to improve my drinking life.
Pope Flores
October 31, 2007   10:48 AM PDT
 

Skip and I drank and had great times together. I also got to see a lot of the original art that went into the mag. During Skip's reign a lot of underground artists got their first major job t PLAYBOY, assuring them a career for life.

Here's a funny fact: the guy who picked the centerfolds, who was the only person on the PLAYBOY staff who lived the lifestyle with a stylish bachelor pad, was gay!

Great taste in naked women I must admit!
Skeptic
April 3, 2008   06:22 PM PDT
 
Mike, if you were keeping Patti off drugs and out of porn and prostitution, who was paying the bills? Who was paying for the condo while you were being "a filmmaker". Where's Patti now? I want to hear her side of the story.

Also, how old are you? Some of this timeline doesn't make sense.
Mike
April 13, 2009   01:55 PM PDT
 
Hi Skeptic- Patti eventually went on to do porn and was involved in an accident that made national press. Her girlfriend died, cocaine was found in the car, and she was going to lose her legs. Wish she had picked the path I tried to show her.

I taught at the Art Institute for 3 years after graduating, and then worked as a apprentice film editor for Don Meier films. Patti was paid lot of money to be in Playboy. And she still stripped.

Plus Lincoln Park was mostly Mexican then- white people were in Old Town. My rent was 450 a month including gas and electric!

I left home at 12, so that throws things off. Check the key to the chapters to catch up.

Marilyn Chambers died today. She was very kind and sexy. I think she was more into Patti though.

I heard from Patti when she started doing porn, haven't heard from her since she lost her legs and porn bios say she dropped from sight after the accident.
Mike
April 13, 2009   02:25 PM PDT
 
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0522175/bio

Leave a Comment:

Name


Homepage (optional)


Comments